life's getting better. the sun started to shine again. the mornings are lighter & the nights a little less heavy. the nightmares are gone. my mind is clearer now. my hands stopped shaking & my stomach doesn't hurt anymore. my eyes aren't burning anymore. my breath reminds me of being alive. i feel grateful. for [...]
Sometimes I forget to be proud of myself. I've been so hard on myself ever since the day I was born. Always striving for perfection, feeling guilty when resting & feeling like I've never done enough, like I never tried hard enough. But God, how hard I tried, how hard I try, every day again. [...]
I don't think pain fades. I know memories fade, but can also be brought back easily by a reminder through the senses. But once love fades, was it even love in the first place? I don't know, maybe? I knew that it was love, because no matter how hurt I was, I never stopped loving. [...]
"You were a danger to my sanity But I was addicted to the madnessIt made me feel alive in a way that to me was unfamiliar But I don't think it was healthy"
I'm full of melancholy, my soul is filled with sadness, but also with wonder, faith and hunger. I'm defined by my dreams, guided by my soul, but I'm being haunted by the world at times. Sometimes depression takes the best of me, while bringing out the worst in me. Whenever this happens, I find it [...]
Freedom is amazing, liberating and all I want But freedom is limiting, in a sense, causes me a heavy heart Although, 'limiting' might not be the right word Perhaps, freedom is just 'scary', in a way I'm full of responsibility and surrounded by so many possibilities I can't blame no one else, I can't blame [...]
I know I can be too much I love too much, I think too much, I want too much It's just that I don't know how to feel less Because feeling too much is all I've ever known It's in my blood, my nerves, my bones, my brains, my soul It's my oxygen, my fuel, [...]