Waiting #Thoughts

I have this odd feeling, I feel like I am always waiting for something. Something, or someone, some feeling or some event. A time, a place, a person or maybe just some fantasy. I am forever waiting for some thing I don’t know anything about. And I wish I knew what I was waiting for, but maybe there is no particular thing. Maybe the waiting is a constant state of mind. Because every time I find something or someone I think I was waiting for, the feeling remains. This feeling of ‘desire’, won’t disappear. Maybe for a few moments, but close after I find the thing I thought I was waiting for, the feeling returns again. It always does and it always will.

I was thinking, maybe I should describe it as ‘hope’. Maybe the waiting is the hope for something better, something brighter. Although, I figured, that ‘something better’ does not exist. It’s this strange kind of craving for something untouchable, something that won’t ever be, and maybe never even was. This something might be metaphysical at heart, or only existing in the mind. I wish I could explain, but I have trouble finding the right words.

I’m just wondering, when will this feeling of waiting ever stop? When I start living in the present? I am sure I already do this, at least 90% of the time, so that can’t be it. Can anybody tell me how to stop craving, how to stop waiting for something quite unknown? I’m dying to know, because it’s killing me inside. I want to be happy, but I can’t be when this feeling stays with me…

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8 thoughts on “Waiting #Thoughts

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      1. It’s okay to feel this way .
        Few days I got this advice on how to live in present which is , whenever you’re stressed about something or over thinking about something ,ask yourself “Am I aware”?
        That moment you’re actually in the moment. And then you can start paying attention to your Breath. Notice how deep or shallow it is ,what is length of your breath .

        Then you can clearly think why you were stressed & you’ll be able find appropriate solution for it

        Liked by 1 person

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